marionette fighting the strings
Thursday, August 18, 2011
Old Post #3
Dating as a single parent can be odd, tricky, and at times downright weird. While we date looking for a companion for ourselves, I think far too many parents miss the important step of considering their child. Even if the child’s other parent is involved in their life the person you date will have some level of influence and affect on your child. Before getting serious with someone each parent needs to sit back and think is that person is a positive influence for their child. Does that man/ woman portray positive characteristics or negative ones? Would he / she teach your child by example how to be a good and decent person? Would this man / woman be willing to support you in your desire to raise a physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually well balanced child? If you are unsure of the answers then proceed with great caution. Children are easily influenced by the people close to them even if they aren’t related to them. So choose your companion carefully…..
Old Post #2
"Have a fun day off," I was told by my daughter's paternal grandmother as I was dropping my daughter off for an overnight visit. I know she meant no harm when she said that, she is one of the sweetest ladies I know. Her words got me to thinking though about the majority of parents. You see I don't see today as a day off, I love Saturdays with my daughter. I want to be at a park with her or playing endless rounds of monopoly. In my perfect world that is what I would be doing. I know time with my daughter is limited as she is getting older every day. I know that in what will seem like a blink of an eye she will be off in college somewhere and I will have lots of "days off." Due to that I try to make the most of every day, every moment that I am blessed with. So to me a "day off" is more like a find something to fill the time day. I know you can say I need to get a life, and I understand. I do have a life. I have a life that my daughter is a part of in every way, and I don't want it to be any different. Once again in several years I will have plenty of me time. My child is not a burden from which I need a break. Is that how the majority of parents see their children? As a tedious job that they get to push off on someone else so they can enjoy themselves? I really don't understand this way of thinking. I mean I have my moments where all I want is thirty seconds so I can pee in peace, but those fleeting moments never add up to needing a whole day off from being a parent. I guess this is just another one of the many ways I think very differently and lack the ability to understand the psyche of the majority.
Old post from years ago
All I could hear was the thumping of my heart. The voice on the phone sounded like that lady from Charlie Brown. My red, steamy hot ears indicated that my blood pressure had soared with the news. I started pacing back and forth like a caged tiger wanting to pounce but utterly unable to do anything but walk. My breathing became irregular as my mind raced a thousand miles an hour. My protective instincts kicked in and I wanted to jump through the phone and attack the guilty party, or just the first person I saw. My daughter was hurt and I was stuck miles away unable to do a darn thing. Helplessness and frustration rolled through me as I trembled, overcome my an incredible wave of mixed emotions. I wanted to punch someone, no I wanted to curl up in a ball and sob. No what I really wanted was to be able to run faster then light, scoop up my daughter and take all of her pain and fear for myself. I am only human so I rushed to the hospital where I waited impatiently like a tiger pacing back and forth, back and forth.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Black hole
We were yin and yang. Two complete separate people. Two unique individuals that fit together perfectly to create a new more beautiful whole. There was no him, there was no me. Those words ceased to exist. There was only us. Two parts sewed seamlessly together as one. Two hearts beating simultaneously to the beat of us. Two lives working in the same singular direction. Pure blissful euphoria. Perfect harmony and pure innocent happiness. Then the rain washed it all away and left me standing alone in a cruel cold world with a black hole in my chest where my heart use to be.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Does it exist?
So after years of being single and determined to stay that way, I find myself occasionally longing for a lifetime partner. A best friend, a lover, someone who I knows will always have my back no matter what. Someone who will be faithful mentally, emotionally, and physically for forever. Two forces joined together going in the same direction, picking up each other when the other is weak. The person who I know no matter what the world throws at me will be there to help me keep going. Someone to keep me in check, to inspire me to be more then I am today. Someone to lean on, someone to encourage me. A person who can count on me unconditionally. Does such a thing exist or is it all just a fairy tale?
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Faith is something
"Let's see how many people on FB aren't ashamed to show their freedom from religion and admit that they don't believe in God... We need to get God out of the world... If you are not ashamed, then copy and paste this in your status..."
A friend posted this as their status and as one could imagine it turned into a huge debate. A rather good one I might say as this person apparently has a lot of friends who actually seemed to think and be on different sides of the debates. So it was a very good very interesting one. In the end if you believe in God or not you have to take a leap of faith at some point and time.
I think we should each respect what anyone else believes with respect and tolerance. Openly discuss or debate but not be critical. It is a little hypocritical to say we have the right to say what we believe but this group over there doesn't. And that goes to either side of ... atheist or non atheist. So good for those who aren't ashamed to say how you feel, but to say we need to get God out of the world is like the door to door person who tells you that you have to get God in your life. It is just as judgmental, it is just from the opposite side of the fence. It is faith vs faith. No matter what you believe or don't believe you have to take a leap of faith. Either you have faith that there is a god or you have faith that there isn't one. You have faith that a God created the world oryou have faith that it was just a coincidence. You have faith in what can't be explained or you have faith in what current science is providing you as fact. Science is constantly developing and changing, constantly disproving previous "facts." The truth is each person has to decide what they are going to put their faith in. Yes, it's a thing of faith. Just because science says one thing, and my beliefe say another doesn't mean they can't coexist. I believe that God exists, and he can do anything. I also believe that God is the smartest being ever. Since God is so smart, I believe that he could figure that evolution and the big bang was the most efficient way do things, thus God could have started evolution if that is the way he saw fit. The point is at some time you have to believe in something even if that means choosing to believe in nothing. And that takes a form of faith. We should all learn to respect and not judge whatever form of faith anyone chooses. That is the point. It is wrong to be a judgmental christian or a judge mental atheist. Love and respect is what is needed. "Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.”
A friend posted this as their status and as one could imagine it turned into a huge debate. A rather good one I might say as this person apparently has a lot of friends who actually seemed to think and be on different sides of the debates. So it was a very good very interesting one. In the end if you believe in God or not you have to take a leap of faith at some point and time.
I think we should each respect what anyone else believes with respect and tolerance. Openly discuss or debate but not be critical. It is a little hypocritical to say we have the right to say what we believe but this group over there doesn't. And that goes to either side of ... atheist or non atheist. So good for those who aren't ashamed to say how you feel, but to say we need to get God out of the world is like the door to door person who tells you that you have to get God in your life. It is just as judgmental, it is just from the opposite side of the fence. It is faith vs faith. No matter what you believe or don't believe you have to take a leap of faith. Either you have faith that there is a god or you have faith that there isn't one. You have faith that a God created the world oryou have faith that it was just a coincidence. You have faith in what can't be explained or you have faith in what current science is providing you as fact. Science is constantly developing and changing, constantly disproving previous "facts." The truth is each person has to decide what they are going to put their faith in. Yes, it's a thing of faith. Just because science says one thing, and my beliefe say another doesn't mean they can't coexist. I believe that God exists, and he can do anything. I also believe that God is the smartest being ever. Since God is so smart, I believe that he could figure that evolution and the big bang was the most efficient way do things, thus God could have started evolution if that is the way he saw fit. The point is at some time you have to believe in something even if that means choosing to believe in nothing. And that takes a form of faith. We should all learn to respect and not judge whatever form of faith anyone chooses. That is the point. It is wrong to be a judgmental christian or a judge mental atheist. Love and respect is what is needed. "Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.”
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Wake up sheple!
We as a society have become a bunch of fat, lazy, people who expect everyone else to tell us how to think. We absorb ourselves with celebrity sex scandals and the current popular sitcom. Tell me how this has any permanent impact on our lives. Why do we sit back and let the government do what it wants as long as our daily dose of crap on t.v. is the same? Does anyone know that the Federal Reserve is a private organization? How many people know about the Copenhagen treaty and the affects it would have on each and everyone of us? What about the current health bill? How about cap and trade? Why are we so content to sit around and talk about stuff like John and Kate when there is actually things of substance to discuss? People need to wake up out of their zombie state and DO something. Stop letting the government solve all the problems. They have only created more. Make the "elected" officials responsible for their actions. VOTE! Call your elected senator and tell them how you feel about issues. in order to do that you have to investigate the issues. Don't depend of Fox news or CNN to tell you how to think. They all obviously have their own spin. Educate yourself, motivate yourself, and then motivate those around you. Can you imagine what would get done if everyone took that hour or two a week that they spent watching crap on t.v. and worked on solving a real life problem. What if we all worked on solving the homeless issue? Or what if we all talked about solutions to the health care problem instead of talking about who so and so slept with. What if each of us decided to think for ourselves instead of trusting what society tells us is "normal?" What if instead of putting so much energy into our selfish pointless desire to reach the top of the social network, we used that energy to solve hunger in Africa? Or used energy to help Rwanda recover? Why or why are we so happy to waste our whole lives away on nothing?
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